Some of the most wonderful moments in life are filled with love. It can be absolutely wonderful, but it can also end up ugly, dark, and cold. Love is what we chose to let it be and knowing that means some control on our part. It also gives us a bit of control over our lover, which makes it hard as two people must function as a single, focused unit. Sometimes this works, but other times it is a miserable failure.
People fall out of love and once it starts it is difficult to stop. The way in which you love will be dependent on how you perceive the other person. What you see in them can trigger emotions. However, love is not just about your feelings. Your partner is just as important, including how he or she feels about your love. If you feel differently about love, your ideas about the relationship will never match up. Granted, it is impossible for two people to feel the exact same way or even at equal levels, but this does not doom every relationship. The key is understanding the differences and finding someone compatible so the differences can be appreciated. All relationships are complex, they just seem simple when they happen to be working.
Relationships require a great deal of work and dedication. Above all else, they require trust or failure is imminent. When people overlook this, they will continue to chase someone who is actively running from them. While this makes sense because we always want what we do not have, it is not really love. Love is never a want; it is a need to be filled. The last thing any of us need is to pursue someone who has already given up on you. This is not the same as someone asking for a bit of personal space to get their life on track, it is a giving up on you.
It is tough to admit that your partner has given up on you and your partnership, but you need to deal with the rejection and move forward. If someone has given up on you, there is no need to waste your time or love on them. There is no point in thinking about what could be if the other person has walked away. To continue to obsess about your ex, you have moved into obsession and denial which is unhealthy. You were likely in love at one point, but now things have changed. Accept this and start building a new life in which you are happy and have reciprocated love.
Your ex made a decision and while you may not be happy about it, they are out living life to the fullest. Why waste your time feeling bad when you can find other things that make you happy? Your ex walked away; they made the choice. It is now time for you to choose to take your life in a new direction. Choose happiness in a new form. When you are content with yourself, new love will find you and be much more likely to stick around.